Merry Christmas

I know I owe you all a blog or two. I know you are all getting ready for the holidays, as am I. Which means I am twice as busy as normal!!!!

Chris continues to make great strides (no pun intended) towards walking. Last Monday Chris was casted for his custom brace. It should take a week or two. We were waiting to hear back regarding a grant that could pay for the brace but have not learned anything about that yet. We decided to purchase the brace with the help of friends and the manufacturer of the brace agreed to refund us if the grant comes through. I only wish I had thought about that option 3 weeks ago, so that Chris could realize his dream of going upstairs by Christmas. Oh, well, he is just as excited at the prospect of it truly happening.

The strength is Chris right has increased by 45%. His left hand is coming back slowly, still not able to grip things but the therapists are hopeful it will get stronger.

I was selling shutters to a woman who lives in Fountain Valley and noticed she had a massage table in her living room. She said this is how she earns a living, hhmmm, my mind starts thinking but I don't mention Chris yet. She somehow brought up that her daughter was in an accident 5 years ago and the Dr.'s told her she would never walk again. Then she said how she learned to do a deep tissue massage, worked on her daughters legs and 3 weeks later, her daughter walked out of the hospital. Of course, I had to bring Chris up and asked if she thought she could help him too. Long story short we had our first appointment with Valerie and it was a huge success. Of course, it is expensive but well worth if it will help Chris walk faster.

This Christmas we are joined by June, Don, my parents, brother, cousin Phil and Chris' cousin Ben (along with wife, Deidre, kids Connor, Shannon and Liam). I love having a house full of people, makes it feel so festive. This year more than ever I appreciate being surrounded by family and friends. I am so thankful for everyone that has thought of us this year, helping to make sure the girls have a merry Christmas. I am in awe of the generous people (person) who secretly dropped off two huge bags of gifts and holiday items for my family. Whoever you are, I am sending you a big hug of thanks. It was so much fun to open those gifts, it really got the holidays started for us. It was cute to hear Caitlin try to figure out if it was God or Santa who asked that person to drop those items off to us. I would also like to thank my Bunco group for the generous gifts for my girls. It is a humble place to be but how lucky am I to have such a wonderful group of friends, neighbors and family. God Bless you all, have a wonderful Christmas and Happy New Year.

Love and gratitude,

Christy

Golf Tourney

Where do I begin? Last Monday the 16th was the golf tournament and auction at Seacliff Country Club here in Huntington Beach. What a beautiful day to golf, I think it was about 77 degrees, clear and sunny. I am grateful to everyone who took a day off to play golf. I know vacation days are limited so I appreciate you using one to be with us. I hope you all had a great time. I know Chris did. I don't think I have seen him smile this much since the accident. Chris was able to greet his guests as they arrived to register for the tourney. Once all the players were off, Chris and I jumped into a golf cart and toured around the golf course. Chris drove the cart and had a blast! It was truly exciting to spend time with him on that beautiful course saying hello to so many friends and making some new ones. 

Chris went home to rest for the big evening as the players finished golfing. I spent the rest of the afternoon with my friend Janine.  Thank you to Janine for spending the day "working" with me. I had a blast with you  on the golf course and visiting the Pyramid booth (thanks Sean for that sweet set up!).

Chris, Caitlin, Regan and FIL (aka Grumpa, Don) returned to Seacliff around five for cocktails    (Shirley Temples, of course) and to view the silent auction items. There was really some neat stuff donated. Not enough room here to thank everyone who made donations but I am honestly touched by the multitude of items given and all those that bid on them.

The highlight of the evening had to be the USC band, fight on!  They were so much fun, what a fantastic surprise. The other highlight being Chris standing and giving a speech. I didn't know he was going to do that, made me cry.

All in all it was a successful event and I thank all of you who attended. I hope you had as much fun as we did. My gratitude to Dan, Jeff and Steve who worked so hard behind the scenes to make this event happen. We appreciate everything you have done for us.

The momentum and happiness of Monday carried us through the rest of the week. Chris walks more everyday in therapy and on Thursday they had him climb a few stairs. His vow is to be able to make it up our stairs by Christmas. He wants to be able to tuck his daughters in their own bed and I know they do too! That would be a wonderful gift.

I hope you all have a beautiful Thanksgiving. I know this year more than any other, I have SO many things to be thankful for.

Love,

Christy

90 Feet

Today I got to see Chris walk!!!!! He went a whole 90 feet. I laughed, I cried, it was so exciting. We arrived at Chris' therapy expecting the same old exercises and instead they bring out what Chris and I call his magic shoes (Forest Gump anyone?). Braces were put on both legs, seriously these things are heavy duty and really do look like the ones that Forest wore. He held onto the parallel bars and walked. After one lap his therapist felt that Chris' right leg was strong enough to take the brace off.  I was just in awe. Some braces will be made for Chris' left leg( again pending cost and no insurance) and the goal is to have him walking around the house with a walker in the near future. How cool is that? It will still be months and months of therapy but that is okay.......I'll take it.

 On another good note, Chris has been sleeping through the night since last Thursday, yeah! He still continues to have super sensitivity to temperatures, moods and noise. He has been open to trying alternative methods to help with these issues, which in the past would soooo not be my Chris.  Mr. I don't like going to the Dr. or dentist is now getting acupuncture!

June or MIL (mother in law) just spent the last month with us. I can't thank her enough for being here. It really take two people in the home to take care of Chris and both kids. June is now back to work in Connecticut. After spending a week with FIL, Don will make his way back to California. My mother graciously volunteered to fill in while the in laws are away. I could have not handled the last 2 1/2 months by myself. I feel so lucky to have the family I do. It has also been a blessing for Caitlin and Regan to spend so much time with both sets of grandparents. It is great to see their relationships blossoming with all the family that has been here helping.

We are getting very excited for the golf tournament on the 16th. We have so many great auction and raffle items. It will be a great evening out, come and join us at the Seacliff Country Club in Huntington Beach.

Love and gratitude,

Christy

WOO HOO A full nights rest

Well it's been exactly a week since we cut Chris off from all meds and last night was the first full night of rest that all of us have gotten since the hallucinations started. The hallucinations scaled down to night terrors by Saturday night then last night nothing at all. I can't tell you how good that felt (for Chris and his mom and myself).

One of the therapists at St. Jude's showed me how to calm Chris down at night called "healing touch". It is the most simple thing but I just lay my hands on Chris, starting at his feet, hold for two minutes and then move up the body. By the time I reach his shoulders he is asleep. That and the ambien give him a good nights rest. At last something I can do to help him feel better, an easy, wonderful way.

Chris continues to get frustrated with his progress, he wants to be walking yesterday. ( I can't blame him). It is so reassuring when we have a visitor who hasn't seen him in awhile come over and say "hey you weren't doing that last time I saw you". Today as we drove in the car he was able to clasp his hands together easily and he commented that last week he struggled to do it by himself. So every week, every day, baby steps are happening.

Last Thursday my meeting with the lawyer did not go as well as I thought. I assumed (silly me) that I would go in, fill some paperwork out, re-apply for MediCal and be done with this part of the nightmare. Ah but no, the lawyer proceeds to tell me that even if we re-apply for MediCal, it won't be retro active because we were denied the first time. Meaning, no coverage for the accident. I was devastated, cried for the rest of the day. I am going to get on my soap box for a moment. How can a person live here their whole life, pay taxes, contribute to society but be condemned when they need help. But if I were to have arrived here from another country they would give me MediCal. How is this right? I tried to buy insurance and they wouldn't sell it to Chris because of a pre-existing condition. Where is the justice? So this part of our journey is still to be ironed out.

On a happier note, the girls are really excited about Halloween. Regan wants to decorate the house more and more. It's not spooky enough she says. Caitlin is going to be a USC cheerleader, surprise, surprise, it is SO her. Regan is going to be a lamp, yes, thats right, a lamp. I love her four year old mind. Thanks to Aunt Jenn for creating her costume, light bulb and all.

My love and gratitude to you all,

Christy

More downs than ups this week

For the last two weeks Chris has really not been himself. He is uncomfortable most of the time. Then last Saturday, he started having hallucinations at night (every night since). It is very frightening to hear him scream out that something is on him or that he is trapped in a box. It is a reaction to some of the meds he is on. There is some discrepancy as to which med it causing this, just depends which Dr.  you talk to. He also has insomnia, so during the day he is exhausted.         ( Which means most of the time, he is pretty cranky)

Due to these issues, we are taking Chris off of all meds and see what happens within the next 24-48 hours. If there is no improvement, I am very sad to say he will need to return to the hospital. Chris is adamant about not going back and it would break my heart to tell the girls that daddy has to go back but if that is what it takes to get him feeling better than that is what we are going to have to do.

I am feeling very much like a single mom these days and I don't like it. My hats off to any woman who is a single mom. Although the girls have been pretty resilient it is still hard for them to understand why daddy isn't quite himself.  I am getting some great tips from a child psychologist and attempting to maintain a "normal" life style for them.

I am off to meet with the lawyer tomorrow to re-apply for MediCal. Hopefully this will be easier the second time around and with someone who does this for a living. If this doesn't work, I honestly don't know what we will do.

I am off to read Fancy Nancy to two little girls who do not want to go to bed yet.

Love and gratitude,

Christy

The Birthday Boy Walks

I know this is a long over due blog. I thought I would have more time to write once Chris came home from the hospital (less driving) but I am actually on the road more between dropping off/picking up both girls from school and Chris at therapy three times a week.

SO, the good news is CHRIS DID WALK!!!!!!! I will try to get a picture posted. The staff at St Jude's re-hab knew it was Chris' goal to walk on his birthday, so they put braces on his legs, hoisted him up and he pulled himself along two parallel bars (with someone standing behind him). I was not there to witness it (Regan's school had Muffins with Mom morning) but both Chris' parents were there to see it all happen. Don (FIL) called to tell me and we were all bawling like babies. I know this was a significant morning for Chris, as his progression has slowed down a bit, this really gave him hope for the future.

The nurses warned that the honeymoon would end, once the novelty of being home and starting out patient therapy started. I think we have hit that point. Chris is uncomfortable in his rental wheelchair because it is not made custom to him (which normally wheelchairs are custom made). Once the custom chair is ordered, it will still take another 3 months for the chair to arrive. St Jude's will not order a chair until we have insurance and thus far we have not been approved for MediCal. This process is so frustrating!!!!!! We have decided to hire a lawyer to do our reapplication because we are loosing precious time to get MediCal, the bills are stacking up and the phone is starting to ring from those trying to collect from us. It is enough just trying to keep up with the day to day needs of Chris and the girls but to add the amount of chasing around social workers, medical bills and Dr,'s it's overhwhelming. I am tempted to just buy Chris a chair (they start at $5,000) and try to get reimbursed once MediCal eventually (hopefully) goes through. I am researching to see if they would reimburse us or if it is better to wait.

I don't mean to be Debbie Downer this morning but these are the realities that we are facing right now.

I would like to once again thank our wonderful neighbors who continue to cook meals for us, they are such a blessing. The support from our friends and family ( and our faith in God) are really getting us through this. The visits, the cards, every little thing is so special to us. I look forward to the day when I can return all this love and kindness. I cherish the day I can be the giver instead of the receiver.

My love and gratitude to you all,

Christy

9/15/09 Our Chris is home!

Chris has been home since Thursday and we could not be happier. Happier and busier. 

Tim and I picked up Chris last Thursday and we have been on the go ever since. He was welcomed home with a big banner made by the girls with Aunt Jenn and we could not skip the cardinal and gold balloons for USC. The girls came home from school shortly after and I am still not sure who was more excited, Chris, Caitlin, Regan or Napa (our yellow lab). One of our neighbors brought us the most delicious dinner to help us celebrate, thanks Charlotte.

 Chris was pretty tired after that so we got him set up in his hospital bed which for now is in our family room. I was so worried about him falling out of bed that I decided to sleep on the couch in the same room. Regan AND Napa decided they wanted to sleep near daddy too. So maybe not the most restful night but Chris said it was still better than any night in the hospital.

From that day on it has been a blur of visits from friends, family and neighbors. On Monday Chris began his out patient therapy at St. Jude's in Brea. While this is a bit of a drive from Huntington Beach (approx 30- 45 minutes away) this is the best in the area and where Chris wants to be. He will have therapy for about two hours, three times a week. This will keep us all on the go, now that school, Daisy's, soccer, art and gymnastics are all in full swing.

We are happy to have daddy home and cannot thank his buddies, Paul, Randy and DJ for creating and installing the coolest ramps I have ever seen (my SIL calls them sexy!). Our hallway is narrow between the family room and dinning room with the only access to the down stairs bathroom......so they created a draw bridge that Chris can raise and lower when he wants to go into the dinning room or bathroom. It is the coolest thing ever. It feels like everyday is getting easier and am so grateful to my family who have REALLY stepped up to be here for us to help with all aspects of our day to day living.

The paperwork roller coaster continues. We were told by one source that we were denied for medi-cal and told we were approved by another source all in the same day. We are still trying to sort that out. The bills continue to pile up, I have stopped opening them as it is too overwhelming to even grasp the amount they are requesting. It keeps me up at night.

I continue to be encouraged by Chris' physical abilities and I know that in therapy it will all be fine tuned. His goal is to walk on his birthday, one month from now. You know I will keep you all posted.

Love and gratitude,

Christy

9/6/09 Good news and more good news

Hello all,

I just came back from returning Chris to St. Jude's. We had a successful home visit!!!!!!! Tim (his brother) and I picked him up at 9:00.Of course his paperwork was not ready, nor was his meds for the day, so we had to wait around for an hour while the nurses scrambled to get all this. Poor guy had been awake at 5 am (as was I) ready to come home.

We had the best day, just being at home, all together. Tim and Jenn arrived from Washington D.C. on Saturday, so the four of us sat in the backyard reading the Sunday paper. The girls were content to stay out of the heat and played inside. At first I tried to make them play outside, so Chris could be near them but he said just hearing them in the background was enough to please him. After awhile the heat became too much for the rest of us, so we moved inside. I recorded the USC game because Chris didn't get that channel in the hospital. Yes, he already knew it was a blow out but was still entertaining to watch. Go Trojans!

If I described the rest of the day it would sound hum drum to anyone else but for us it was a pleasure to be under one roof, enjoying a lazy Sunday. We had permission to keep daddy until 8 PM. After Tim cooked his mom's baked ziti recipe, as requested by Chris, he looked exhausted. I had a feeling he was ready to go back and go to sleep. He said his mind didn't want to leave but his body did. As soon as we announced that, Caitlin had a meltdown, she wanted daddy to stay. I thought I had made it clear to her that this was just for the day. She made a huge production of crying and clinging to him. I am sure that did not make it any easier for Chris to go.

He will be back for good on Thursday and now I know we are all ready. We were able to get his wheelchair into the house and he fit through every door way necessary. We even got him up the huge step into the dinning room and kitchen. We ate dinner at the table, as a family. Ah, the simple pleasures.

On another good note, Chris had a second MRI done yesterday on his brain. I didn't share this with many because I just couldn't bare the thought, but they want to make sure he had not had stroke when he hit the water. I am just finding out now that both arteries were clogged when they went in for one of his neck surgeries (not sure if it was the first or second). They were suspicious that this was the reason that his left side is not moving yet. I only learned of this yesterday morning and have been sick to my stomach ever since. We just happened to run into his Dr. this morning when we were checking out and she looked at the reports super quick to let us know, all is well, no stroke. Hopefully that just means it is a matter of time before the left side moves.

I am off to dream of Chris walking. Good night to you.

Love and gratitude,

Christy

9/3/09 Not so cheery today

I am finding that I don't want to write if I don't have something positive to say. I am just that kind of person, normally the glass half full kind of gal.

This week has been difficult. I have been drowning in the social services red tape. I keep thinking I am done and then I get a new form or question. I honestly don't think my patient advocate knows what she is doing, but what can you do when the these people are assigned to you. If I could afford a lawyer to do this paperwork for me, I would probably be well off enough to not apply for all this stuff.

Chris has been nauseated for the last three weeks but it has been really bad for the last few days. Therefore, he does not want to eat, therefore he is very weak. He has already lost 22 pounds over the last two months. Tuesday the therapists ran some tested the strength on his left and right leg. The right leg (the one that moves) has gotten stronger, yeah! The left leg (which hasn't moved) has some how gotten weaker and the Dr.'s are stumped as to why. This morning they decided to take some blood and run some tests. They are doing an MRI at 4:00. I am feeling guilty for not being at the hospital. The girls have been struggling for a couple of days, school started and this morning Regan called me a jerk. She then burst into tears and said she didn't know what the word meant.  (and yes, she got a BIG time out for that one.) It definitely has been a challenging week.

OK, in the middle of typing this Chris called and cheered me up, AGAIN. We really do help each other and I think we make a great team.

Caitlin is off to art class, so I must log off now. Sorry for the not so cheery entry today, Hopefully tomorrow will be filled with better news.

Thirteen days and counting 8/28/09

Sorry I have not had a chance to write much this week. I can't believe it's already Friday night, this week has flown by.

Chris will be home in thirteen days! Chris comes home on September 10th. He will do a test run on the sixth. It's all me on the sixth though......no therapists, no nurses and no Dr.'s. That's okay, I am up for the challenge. I pick him up bring him home for a few hours and then take him back. The nurse says several times the families call and ask if the patient really needs to return to the hospital and I can see that happening in our case too. The girls are already planning the festivities.

This week Chris had some peer counseling.  A guy from Huntington Beach came for a visit. He had a car accident, was taken to Western Med (just like Chris) and then on to St. Jude's (just like Chris). He left St. Jude's a quadriplegic but he WALKED into Chris room. Chris was so encouraged. He really want to continue his outpatient therapy with St. Jude's. This will take some coordinating (it's a 45 minute drive from Huntington Beach) especially with one child that gets out of school at noon and one that gets out at 2:30 but so worth it if it means Chris will walk sooner rather than later.

Today Chris had an outing. The hospital took about 5 patients that are in wheel chairs to the local Target Greatland (huge store). I met them there and shared a lemonade with Chris. We walked around the store. Okay, I know it's only Target (not knocking it but not my first choice for a date) but it felt so good to be out and about with Chris. We had fun looking around, laughing, both surprised Target is filled with Fall/Halloween stuff already. Are you kidding me? It's 101 degrees outside and they are selling flannel shirts down the mens aisle. Are those making a come back? Anyway, I digress. It was great to hang out, away from the hospital, the constant sounds, beeps, other patients, the hustle and bustle that goes on in a hospital day and night.

I am still wading through the mess of paperwork. It seems never ending. I found out that I wasn't targeted for fraud, it's just that they investigate about 1 in every 50 claims. As the clerk on the phone said "you just got lucky". Haven't I already been "lucky" enough this summer? I will get through, I just can't wait to be done with it.

Last Sunday our Minister talked about "Taking it to the Limit" with God. He had one verse that really spoke to me. "The outward man does indeed suffer wear and tear, but every day the inward man receives fresh strength" 2 Corinthians 4:16. That reminded me of Chris.

My special thanks to all our neighbors and friends who continue, two months into this, to still help us everyday with dog walking, lawn mowing, babysitting and delicious meals. I feel so blessed to have you in our lives.

Gratitude and love,

Christy

8/22/09 Screaming Eagles

Today was the big match up between LA Galaxy and DC United. Chris and his brother are both fans. Tim is part of the Screaming Eagles, fan club for DC United. Today at the game the Screaming Eagles did some fund raising for Chris. They had a booth in the parking lot, selling T shirts, taking donations and promoting the website. It was so exciting  to see Aunt Jenn and Uncle Tim on TV, I can't wait to show Caitlin and Regan in the morning. I can't thank Fox Soccer Channel enough for getting the website on the air. You could see a huge banner during the whole game that said WWW.CHRISWILLWALK.COM. So cool!

Thanks to cousin Ben and Tim for putting this all together. I have it recorded on our DVR and know Chris will be thrilled when he sees it when he gets home in three weeks.

Today the girls and I took daddy some Pick Up Sticks (thanks Monica). He was so happy to have a break from the hospital food. Chris told us they had him practicing getting in and out of a car, so shifting from a wheel chair to the seat in a car. They have an actual car (without an engine) at the hospital that patients can use to work on this skill. How great is that. I never would have thought about it. In two weeks they will have him practice in one of our cars. They are truly preparing him to come home and function as much as possible on his own.

The staff also has Chris doing some cooking. I asked if that meant he would cook when he comes home, the nurse just smiled and said she couldn't guarantee it. Darn it!

We just had an overall really good visit. I left feeling very fulfilled and happy to be together as a family. I realize how good it feels for the four of us to be spending time together. I am grateful to those that saved Chris' life. He is alive and anything else I get after that is a bonus. I  think I am a lucky girl to have fallen in love with my best friend and to have had 10 wonderful years together in marriage. Okay, am I getting too mushy? I was going to write the next paragraph about how funny and intelligent our kids are but I will save that for another blog. What can I say, I am a proud mom.

Do me a favor and take a minute to be grateful for all you have. Just 60 seconds to say thanks for what you have; a healthy body, family, a job, a home, friends, whatever it is. I know how easy it is to get caught up in the day to day stuff. I do it all the time myself but tonight I am thanking God for all He has given me.

Love and gratitude,

Christy

3 Weeks and Counting 8/21/09

I had a frustrating morning of red tape and paperwork today.  Apparently the fraud department of SS thinks it looks suspicious that we have had no income in a year, umm, do they know about the recession we are in and the unemployment stats?

 I decided to go visit Chris in the afternoon. I ask the girls if they would like to come with. Regan decided she would rather go to the beach with Grandma Casey (my mom, has taken over for FIL, aka Don, who has returned home to CT for a few weeks). Caitlin, of course opted to go with me. She still has a hard time leaving me, which I understand completely.

We arrive in record time (gotta love those carpool lanes) and just miss seeing Chris in his therapy session. He apparently showed some movement in the left hip. Again, small victories everyday. Chris said he had his best day ever therapy wise and was so animated in his description of his workout. Once again he was cheering me up, when I should be there to cheer him up.

We read Chris a stack of cards that had arrived and had a blast watching the X games on TV, those guys are crazy! Caitlin loved it.

Tomorrow they are going the mention Chris and his story on Fox channel Soccer report. Chris and his brother are DC United Fans. They will also show a www.chriswillwalk.com banner during the LA Galaxy-DC United game on Saturday on Fox. How exciting!

I am off to bed, going to read the third Twilight book and try to forget about the stack of hospital bills that plague my desk.

My love and gratitude to you all,

Christy

8/15/09 Holy rummage sale batman!

Okay, feeling a little like Carrie Bradshaw as I sit in my PJ's nightly and type but I like it and am feeling very inspired by the days events.

What a great rummage sale! I owe the biggest thanks to all who organized, Molly, one of the most organized people I know. Ann, the friend I've had the longest whose laugh I could hear across the parking lot kept me smiling. To Meredith and Jami the best bouncers a rummage sale could ever have. And where would I be without Lang's and their huge trailer. I don't know how I could ever thank you all enough. I appreciate the time you gave today and the time it took to organize the days events.......I am so impressed and appreciative.

Thanks to all the guys who took time on their Saturday to be our braun and to help price the sports stuff (Brett, Javier,Brian). A special thanks to Mark, who wins the prize for selling the most avocados, is everyone having guacamole tonight? Brandon, thanks for being part of the clean up crew.

Emily and Christine, thanks for taking such special care with all the clothes and for finding the special items that could be better used for Working Wardrobes. I am happy to know a good home was found for those items that could be used elsewhere.

My Bunco ladies, Kristin, Rose, Lori, thanks for taking the early, early shift and fending off the early, early shoppers. I hope you had as much fun as I did!

Thanks to all the Hawes families, Mrs. E's Preschool families and neighborhood friends who came out to support us today. I really don't know how else to express myself other than to say I appreciate it all and feel so blessed to call you my friends. How lucky can one girl (family) be?

For those of you who live farther away, this was the largest rummage sale I have ever been involved it. It covered the entire parking lot of Caitlin's school. We had sections of items, booths for baked goods, a T shirt sales booth and a check out booth at the entrance. I would guess we had over 35 volunteers working today. The set up started at 5:30 am and the Salvation Army truck came at 3:00 to pick up all that was left over.

Love and Gratitude,

Christy

8/14/09 HE STANDS!!!!!!!

Just got off the phone with Chris. I have not been able to visit him for the last few days because I have a cold and I guess that's a no-no in hospitals. I thought since he is on so many drugs, he can't catch anything from me but I was wrong.

Anyway, Chris said in therapy today he stood! Okay, it was only for a minute but it's a minute more than a month ago (can't believe it's been a month already). Three times today they attached him to a harness and he stood. I was so thrilled and did not think they would have him try this until his left leg woke up. So exciting! He was also able to transition himself from his bed to his wheelchair by himself which is also a big step forward.

Today his therapy started at 10:30 and ended at 3:30 with only a half hour in between sessions. They are really working him now. He is tired but a good, grateful tired he says. Chris also started eating his meals in the dinning hall. There are only a few other patients who are able to leave their rooms to eat but Chris says it is a nice chance to get out of his room.

I am hoping tomorrow I will be well enough to go see Chris after the rummage sale at Hawes Elementary. I am excited to sell, sell, sell. We have been given some great stuff and once again in awe of the generosity of my neighbors, friends and even more from strangers.

Caitlin and Regan seem to doing relatively well. Last night Caitlin said I wish if daddy had to get hurt it would be only a little bit, so he could still be home with us. I told her me too. Regan on the other hand has decided she likes going to visit daddy because it means they get to watch a movie in the car (thanks to Aunt Jenn for the DVD player) this is something they usually only get to do on longer car rides.

Thank you to everyone who came to visit Chris this week. He said emotionally it was a tough week and the visits really help.

I going to bed early and dreaming of Chris not only standing but walking too.

Christy

8/8/09 Texas hold'em

I feel bad I haven't written in a few days, this is my therapy so I need to get back to it.

We had our family meeting on Thursday with the head Dr. and the therapists that work with Chris. They seemed please with his progress but won't commit to anything. We asked about the trache coming out and all they would say is "it should come out before he leaves". Well, it came out later that day, so I don't know how much I trust what they say. They also said he would be at St. Jude for six weeks from Thursday. So, who knows, he could be home tomorrow. Don't get me wrong I am happy about the trache coming out but they have as much commitment as David Beckham at this point (like that one Tim?)

Chris' progress continues to amaze me, he can bend and lift his right leg now and seems as if he has more and more function with his hands. We all need to pray and visualize the left leg  moving. It has some catching up to do. Yesterday they put Chris in a wheel chair and told him to go where ever he wanted (on the second floor, that is.......hey baby steps, at least he is getting out of his room). He wheeled himself around the wing and enjoyed the outdoor patio for a bit. Chris said it felt great to have some freedom. When I left him in the afternoon, he was going to play Texas hold'em with two other patients in wheel chairs. They sure do try to make the therapy fun and ever changing.

Thursday night I was so tired I wasn't planning on driving back up to Fullerton. The girls and I finished dinner and Caitlin asks if we are going to see daddy. How can I say no? Don said he would drive. We hit traffic, the battery on the DVD player pooped out and everyone was cranky. I thought, maybe this isn't such a good idea. We finally get there. Caitlin crawls into bed with Chris and falls asleep in his arms. OKAY, ALL WORTH IT. Made my day. (allergies anyone?)

 Chris has really enjoyed all of his visitors, thank you to everyone that has made the trip. I know it helps break up the day for him.

My love and thanks to you all,

Christy

8/4/09 One step forward, one step back

Just got back from seeing Chris. His brother is leaving tomorrow to head back to Washington D.C. and I am sad. The girls have really enjoyed having uncle Tim here, he has spoiled them with attention. It warms my heart to see them respect and love him at the same time. We look forward to having Tim and his wife, Jenn back here sometime in September.

Chris did not have his trache removed on Monday as previously thought. The Dr. who was attending that day was worried that it was a bit premature and wanted to really be sure Chris could cough on his own.  Chris was disappointed but understands it's better to be safe than sorry. They gave him a smaller trache today, which he says is a little easier than than larger one. So, one step back.

The step forward is he got to the workout room on Monday! Originally they said on Thursday, so a few days early. Okay, it was a quick trip because his blood pressure started to drop but I still see it as a positive. He went to the work out room again today........twice for an hour each. He is making great strides, everyday. His right leg continues to move more and more, the left is coming along, just not as quickly. Chris is also able to put his right hand thumb and pointer finger together, so more movement in his hands too! ( SO maybe more than one step forward).

At St. Jude's they have a family meeting once a week, where we get to sit down with Chris, his doctors and any family, so we can hear about their opinions on his progress. They will be giving us a general outline as to when they think Chris can come home. Chris said he heard he would be there six weeks in total because we don't have a shower downstairs for him to use. Of course I want him home sooner but I need him to get strong and be physically ready. I know he is already mentally ready to be home.

Caitlin is still struggling with Chris not being here. She doesn't eat much and can't seem to fall asleep easily. Luckily I ran into our pediatrician, while she was walking her dog (it pays off to have your pediatrician live two streets away) and she gave me some great ideas on how to help her. Regan is the one who keeps me laughing. Being four her world is all about play-dates, Webkinz and watching the Disney channel.

Looks like the rummage sale is organized and all set to be at Hawes school on August 15th. Thank you again to Molly, Ann, Meredith, Lisa and Jami for taking charge of this event. If anyone needs more info, just let me know.

PS Chris read most of the blog today........so feel free to post a message to him.

Goodnight for now, as always, thanks for your prayers,

Christy

8/1/09 Mystery meat Vs. In and Out

Chris and I were supposed to be at a friends wedding today. I am reflecting on how much our lives have changed. I overheard Caitlin telling her friend Olivia "My dad moved his leg today" and they both jumped for joy.  I am feeling melancholy tonight. I know I should be happy for all things things we will be doing, not all the things we were supposed to be doing.

Don (FIL) and Tim (BIL) went to visit Chris this morning before any of his therapy began. The girls and I stayed home and it felt great. We have trying to keep busy, almost too busy, going here and there. Caitlin and Regan enjoyed staying in their PJ's until noon, building a fort with the couch cushions. I was able to catch up on some long over due house cleaning and laundry. It was nice to just be home.

Don and Tim returned home energized after seeing Chris. They said he was in great spirits and talked about the therapy he had the day before. For now, all the therapy is done in his room. He was able to get himself into a wheel chair. He said it was painful and took a long time but he did it. The goal is to get Chris to the workout room in the hospital by next Thursday. When he tries to sit up, his blood pressure drops and he gets light headed. So the goal his to get him able to sit up, then he can do more extensive therapy.

Chris also had one request for the day.......In and Out for dinner! The menu choices for dinner were mystery meat or mystery meat. I think his is already over it. So Caitlin, Regan and I brought him some fries and a double double. The whole wing of his floor smelled like In and Out. I think next time I might have to bring some for the other patients too!

While we were visiting Chris told me about his vivid dreams the night before. He said he was standing and he remembers thinking please don't let this be a dream. Then he woke up. He said it was so clear, so real. He looked me in the eye and said " I am walking out of here", all I could do was nod with tears in my eyes. The girls asked what was wrong and I blamed it on allergies (works every time, I learned that one from Erina).

As always, my love and thanks to all of you,

Christy

7/31/09 He moved AGAIN

Okay, okay stop me if this gets old because it won't get old to me until he is walking again. Chris moved his leg side to side today!

 Caitlin and I went to visit Chris today after his first full day in rehab. He looked exhausted! He had pushed, pulled, moved, shook any which way possible today. I called the hospital in the morning to ask what would be the best time to visit and they said 3 pm, thats a long day of working out, especially for someone who has been on their back for the last three weeks. He brighten up when Caitlin ran into his room. He said "I have a new trick today, want to see it" and then he moved his right leg side to side, again, ever so slightly. It just gives me hope!

We had a great visit and while we were reading some of the cards he received in walks a high school friend from Boston that just happened to be in California on vacation when he heard the news about Chris. Chris was so touched by his visit. Again, he cried.( Oh, he is going to mad when he gets to read all my posts for himself! )

Among other great news we also found out Chris will have his trache removed permanently on Monday. Even though he is breathing and talking on his own, they left it in just to be safe. It really bothers him and makes him cough a lot, so I know how happy he is to be rid of it.

I had a frustrating day doing paperwork. Thanks to Steph and Alicia for watching the girls today as I try to navigate our complicated system called social security. You think you are done and they send you a letter saying, opps, you forgot to fill out form XYZ!@#$$%^. Well if they had given that form to me the first, second or third time I had been to their office, I would have filled it out. I just don't get it. 

It has been great having Chris' brother Tim here (from Washington DC) to see Chris and visit with the girls. While I am lucky enough to have FIL (Father in law) living with us right now, it is comforting to see the girls looking to Tim for guidance and reassurance. He also very kind playing horsie and giving them as many piggy back rides as they want. His poor back.

Thank you again for all your love and prayers, I feel them working.

Love,

Christy

PS If anyone wants to visit Chris I recommend calling the day before you want to go (or even the same day) to ask the nurse what his schedule is. His scheduled work outs for tomorrow are different than they were yesterday, so they may vary from day to day. St Jude's number is 714-992-3000, ask for the rehab desk.

7/30/09 He moved!!!!

I don't know what to write about first, there is so much to share.

First last night was amazing at Z Pizza and Yo Yum Yum!!!! It reminded me of the feeling I had at my wedding, so many people I cared about in one place, so much warmth and love. I wanted to stay all night in that happy place. Thank you, thank you, thank you to everyone that came and bombarded these two business all for Chris. Z Pizza said they did 3 times there normal business, that's what I'm talking about! I am so touched by all the familiar and not familiar faces I saw eating and wearing a Sheetz 09 shirts. I already printed out the pictures and showed them to Chris. I'm not gonna lie, it made him cry.

Next, the best news yet...CHRIS MOVED HIS TOE!!!!!!! ever so slightly, but it moved. Of course no Dr. is saying that it means anything but a week ago they couldn't tell me when he would talk again and look at him now, he doesn't shut up. I have all the faith in the world that he WILL walk again and so does Chris. It has only been three weeks, what progress.

Then, today, he was accepted and moved to St Jude's Hospital in Fullerton for rehab. This was a surprise to me and Chris but once they decided they had a bed open for him, they wanted to get him there as soon as possible. They loaded him up in ambulance (once again but not as scary this time) and made the trip to Fullerton. The girls and I followed. This is only the second time they have seen him since the accident and they couldn't wait to talk to him. Last time they saw him he was not talking yet. It was the best to see all three of them having a chat in Chris' new room.

I think you can visit any time but they are aggressive with his workouts and have him doing stuff until about 1:00 tomorrow. I will let you know what is the best time, for now probably late afternoon, early evening.

My love and thanks to you all,

Christy

7/28/09 Mystery meat and lemondae

Well, another first today. Chris was able to eat some solid food. Oatmeal type stuff for breakfast. Tonight I fed him his mystery meat, mashed potato and washed it down with 3 cups of lemonade. He was very happy to have solid food, just not happy it is hospital solid food.

Thanks for friend Miranda who brought him 4 boxes of root beer popsicles that he has been talking about for the last 3 days. Chris asked me to please bring a cooler with water, sprite and smoothies. My brother Dave walked in with the cooler asked the nurse for some ice and told her she was welcomed to join us for Margarita's. Without skipping a beat she said she couldn't drink while she is on duty.

FIL and I toured St. Jude's in Fullerton this morning. What a beautiful hospital. It looks like they have a great rehab program, beds available and they are willing to take medi cal pending. I talked to Chris about the struggle to get him into Rancho Los Amigo's and he is anxious to get started in some type of re hab. He would like to pursue St. Jude's, so that is what I am going to focus on.

Today Chris ran a fever of 102, so they are doing some x-rays to make sure there are no blood clots. He ran a high fever the first 5 days in the hospital and they were worried about pnumonia (sp?)(I don't know how to use spell check on this, sorry), so I am hoping that is not the case now. The nurses have also been trying to get him to sit up in bed but he becomes dizzy quite quickly and his blood pressure drops. I am sure it will just take some time.

At home life remains very busy, taking Caitlin to VBS this week and many friend who have stepped up and offered playdates for Regan. This has allowed me some free time to fill out the mountains of paperwork I have to prepare for Social Security. What a bunch of red tape! Caitlin is still having issues with me leaving, which makes it hard to get to the hospital as often as I would like to. It is a balancing act, kids, hospital, work and maintaing the home (to some degree). Luckily my mom and brother arrived to help for a few days. As always I have FIL too!

I am off to read some more Twilight and then to sleep.

I encourage everyone here in Huntington Beach to go to Yo Yum Yum and Z Pizza tomorrow for the fundraiser. Tell them it is for chriswillwalk.

Love,

Christy